Once More with Feeling
I’ve tried, I really have. Done my best, followed all the rules, done what everyone do and while they manage to nourish life and growth, I bring death and destruction. I confess.
I suspect it's mainly because I don't touch it. I don't even speak to it. Susan, who does my housekeeping, waters it once a week, one of the other attendants turns it twice a year and occasionally, people will pick off yellow leaves (which it develops with precision every October) and in the spring, I get someone to cut off the dead branches resulting from the leaves that fall off over the winter. And somehow, despite this kind of plant being notoriously 'nervous' and difficult to cultivate, it's taken over my living room. As well, I have a money tree on my bathroom counter consisting of three no-longer-braided branches that's almost reached the ceiling (now if only my bank account reflected this growth) and again, I suspect it's mostly because aside from watering it when it looks dry, I pretend it isn't there. But these are my only success stories of the last 13 years (okay, of my life), which is annoying because I'd prefer to have the house thronged with plans. But I've learned my lesson, no longer wish to inflict pain and suffering on various greenery and just don't buy plants anymore, because it just seems cruel and inhumane.
This is a Chinese evergreen. This "thrives on neglect". We are a match made in heaven.