On the Other Hand

So there I was the other night, whingeing. Muttering about the busy, the endless lists and errands and to-ing and fro-ing and how I run around madly all day, collapse and sleep like the dead for an hour or so for my Mandatory Rest Period and then most days, up and at ‘em again until about 10pm, which is the main time I have for talking to friends, except by then I’m so fried I don’t want to talk to anyone and the other days, I make dinner and then sit and drool in front of the idiot box, incapable of intelligent thought. And I said to myself “just look at the list, will you! Look at it! 15 things to be done today!! Yesterday was the same and tomorrow won’t be any different!” (I said this mostly to myself, as besides the part about no time for the phone, there’s the awareness that bellyaching is boring for other people to listen to and being conscious of the fact that my mother is stuck in a nursinghome and thus have more reasons to bitch than I do). Anyway, I was feeling sorry for myself, reviewing my lists, being mightily put out about my inability to sit in the park and read (only twice this summer – what is the world coming to?) and then I realized that everything except one or two minor items was done and this stillness crept over me, leaving the moment drawn out and almost holy. And then I laughed and laughed, because get this - every day, I get most of the list done!. Two months ago, I posted about being a tortoise, doing one thing a day, having no energy for more. And now, I am running the lives of two people. Sure, I’m exhausted and after 5 weeks of this pace, need to consider stopping for a few days or risk my body making sure I stop by developing some illness or other, but! I’m doing it!!

And that’s when I stopped whining and became grateful instead. I used to do a regular thing, posting about gratitude and I’m thinking it’s time to get back in the habit again. So here are some other things I’m grateful for:

24-hour grocery stores.

Weather that allows for doing your grocery shopping in the evening instead of being trapped in your apartment the minute the sun thinks about nearing the horizon for fear of frostbite.

Friends who run errands, friends who listen and friends who take me to lunch for silliness and socializing.

John/TinkPapa recovering like a spring chicken from his hip replacement, going back to work a week early. Dude knits like a starfish (y’know… the grow another arm if one’s cut off. Tortured analogy, I know – feel free to leave a better/wittier one in the comments).

After being laid off due to company closure, Janne/TinkMama got a job after only 1 week of unemployment. Temporary, sure, but she’s so damn talented, she’ll find a permanent one in no time.

Saw my rheumatologist last week and instead of crying in her office, I babbled on about how great everything is. She looked at my hands and said with a bit of a wince “you can see all your deformities” (because the swelling/inflammation is gone) and although I normally don’t like the D-word, I replied “I know! Isn’t it great?!”. All hail Humira!

And I’m grateful for Canada. 25 years ago tomorrow, my family and I got on a plane in Copenhagen and flew across the Atlantic to Toronto. For “one or two years”. But instead of going back, we’ve made a life here, have found good friends (one of whom married my sister and got her preggers with the Tinks), created a family of choice and put roots down deep.

I am rich beyond measure.

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