The Seated View

Every time I wash my hands or brush my teeth I see it in my washroom mirror. The line at the base of my throat, a barely-there horizontal divot that is the only visual reminder of my medical adventure . It jolts me every time, bringing back a moment of memory so intense that for a split second my core is shaken. It feels like a speeded-up movie reel of hospital highlights plays within me, plucking at all the senses involved in the memory. Everything I felt — fear, curiosity, helplessness, frustration, to name a few — overwhelms me. And then I get the soap or toothpaste and life continues. You might wonder why I get that surprise so many times a day. After all, it’s only been three months since I got home from the hospital. Surely I still remember? And yes, all of that is true, yet there it is.   April 16, celebrating with the Tinks,  only a few hours away from being discharged  from the hospital (Photo by Janne) Life has in many ways ret...

How very apropos! I am taking a leave of undetermined time from my job at HealthCentral to allow my body to recover fully before I do the work thing. And this is when my new post for Mango Health on the work-life balance with chronic illness was published: "It’s only been two months since I was discharged from the hospital after what I call a “medical adventure,” which included a lengthy stay in the ICU . Recovery is taking a long time, and although my energy levels are much better than they were, I still run out of steam fairly quickly. Any energy I have goes toward work in order to pay the bills. Suffice to say, that elusive concept of work-life balance is even harder for me these days. Balance, Schmalance Balance isn’t just about meeting your obligations at work and with your loved ones. It’s also about creating a life that makes you happy. If you’re lucky enough to have a job you love (I do!), it can fill up the need for happiness for a long time. And then so...

 Mary and Ginger. Photo by Ralph Blakely, III I don’t remember exactly when and why Lynn introduced me to her cousin Mary. I think it had something to do with Mary being diagnosed with RA and Lynn thinking that we’d hit it off. So we emailed and then we called each other and yes, indeed. We hit it off. One of our biggest regrets was that Mary lived in Charleston and I in Toronto. We had plans that someday, we would get together and laugh our butts off while eating good food. We did a lot of that — the laughing. Mary was funny. Ridiculously funny and smart and that’s the best combination there is. Despite having lived many years in Ireland and then Charleston, Mary’s voice was quintessential New York. Raspy, straight out of the city accent, and she swore like a sailor. Always appropriately and in context, which made everything so much more funny. She was one of the first women to be diagnosed as HIV-positive in the late 1980s and was one of its longest surviv...

The Redpath Waterfront Festival took place last weekend, bringing a bunch of tall ships to Toronto for the long weekend. It was also Canada Day and the culmination of Pride. There was a lot of fun things to do, but I veered towards the lake and the tall ships. The Canadian Navy was there, escorting the ships on their Great Lakes tour .(click photos to embiggen) I worked my way from east to west along the harbourfront, taking in the ships. There were some school ships taking part and as usual when that term is uttered, I turned a nice shade of chartreuse with envy. I’ve always wanted to go on a school ship.  But let’s face it, it doesn’t matter what kind of tall ship we’re talking about, I want to be on it. Although there were tours of the ships, these types of conveyances don’t tend to be all that accessible, so I had to settle for looking admiringly on from the shore. I picked up an audiobook for the weekend called Sails on the Horizon, which made...